I Let Go, I Fell In

Hello, i hope you are all okay?
Just wanted to do a quick post. Things are going quite well, it's getting hard though, i won't lie. I just really want to have something nice and sweet to eat. But i know it will make me fat so that is a no no. Today on the ABC is a fast day, i am doing well so far, i only have 5 more hours to go. Soon i will be off to bed so i won't have to think about it. Urghh i just really hate fasts :).
I am so cold today, here in England it's just constantly been raining :(. I don't mind the rain but it's getting boring now and i just want to see some sunshine. The sunshine always gives me motivation.
I am hoping to get down to 112lbs by Monday. I just feel like that won't happen though. Maybe it will, maybe it won't :(.
I also wanted to say thank you to my 3 lovely followers. It's nice to have someone following me :)
Night xxxxxxxx

Stronger Than I'm Used Too

Hello everyone,
I am super happy today, i fasted all day yesterday which i am really proud at. Also i weighed in this morning and the scales said 113.4lbs. I was not expecting that number. I thought i would at least be 114.
It seems that hard work does pay off.
I had work today so it was easy to avoid food, then when i came home i had half a apple, cup of coffee and three Ryvitas, which should be around 200 calories i think.
I have a headache, i don't know whether it's because i am tired or the lack of food. Does anyone else get headaches when they restrict?
I really hope i can keep this up.
Night night x x x

How Long Do I have To Wait For The Sun To Shine Again?

Hello everyone :)
Today's not been such a good day again. I know, i am failing you as well as myself. No one wants to read a blog where all they do is fail, you want to read a blog that strives for what they want, so it can also help you strive, if that makes any sense at all.
I really hope i am not losing my motivation, tomorrow is my weigh in day but after such a horrible week this week i am terrified of what the number will be.
I think i am going to fast tomorrow instead of Wednesday because i have college Wednesdays and it would look really weird if i didn't eat anything and tomorrow is my day off so i will be home and no one cares about what i eat at home. They think that i eat alot anyway seeing as i am such a fat pig.
Is it just me but when i eat something bad or that has alot of calories in it, i feel dirty like i need to have a shower, i know that sounds really weird but that is truly how i feel right now because of all the shit i have eaten.
I really need my motivation back, has anyone got any ideas?
I am going to the gym tomorrow and i am going to work really hard, i might try and spend at least 2 hours in there. I don't like to spend too long in the gym because i feel like that will be a waste of my time. Don't get me wrong i actually love going to the gym, it's just if i spend too long in there and work overboard i think that would put me off and i wouldn't want to go any more. I do exercise almost every where i go though. I don't have a car so i just walk everywhere and whenever i am listening to music i love to just dance lol.
Anyways sorry for the long post but i feel like sometimes i don't blog enough :(.
Stay strong girls and keep up the good work :)
Bye x x x

A Little Bit Of Heaven, A Little Bit Of Hell

Hey,
Yesterday went really well, it was a fast day for me on the ABC. However today didn't go so well, i didn't really binge but i ate alot and it was all junk really. It was my little sisters birthday and she was really excited and i didn't want to ruin it by being weak and tired and not eating something. Because if i didn't eat something she would know that something was wrong, she would think that i wasn't enjoying her party if that makes sense. I didn't have any cake though, it was triple chocolate and it looked really sickly, i just couldn't face it. I had some cookies my sister made. Bless her!
I went to the gym and did some running but now my leg is throbbing every time i walk which is a pain in the backside.
I might go to the gym tomorrow to at least make up for some of today, i usually do ab workouts on Fridays, so maybe i will go to the gym in the morning and then do my abs in the evening.
I am allowed 200 calories tomorrow so that will be quite easy.
I just hope the motivation i have had this past week and half isn't fading away. I am going to try and hold onto it as long as i can.
Tomorrow is my last day off and then i have work Saturday which i am really looking forward to getting back to, i will be back to my routine and hopefully i will be too busy to think about food.
I think when i reach 110lbs, i will post some pictures of how my body looks, it's just being brave enough to post them :(.
Anyways, i am going to go so i can do some dancing to try and burn at least some calories of this junk in my body.
Night x x x

Words Are Like Weapons, They Wound Sometimes

Hello,
Whoopsie! So today i had a pretty bad day. Everything was going fine until about 4pm. I didn't eat much but what i did eat had quite alot of calories.
I weighed in again at 115lbs this morning. I have decided not to weigh myself until Monday, even though it kills me to wait that long.
I am going to the cinema with a friend tomorrow and it's a fast day on the ABC for me. I am not really worried about food though because i don't like to eat in public places. If she wants something to eat, i will just get a coffee. I am really worried that i will look fat though, the last time my friend saw me was when i was about 105lbs. So 10lbs is pretty noticeable . Oh well, the next time i will see her, i will be thinner.
I brought some new sweatpants today and they were a UK size 6 (I think that is a US 2, correct me if i am wrong), they were a bit tight, but they definitely fit, which i was very happy about. But i still look so fat. No joke, i have a really big tummy, big thighs and quite chunky arms. Erghh!
Thought i would post some thinspo.

The Way You Make Me Feel

Hey,
So this week has finally been a success, i have stuck to the ABC very well, i will admit, i had a bit of a blip on Friday but Saturday i went straight back to the ABC. I am really liking this diet, i do feel hungry sometimes but not as much as i thought i would, it's usually at night before i go to bed that my tummy starts rumbling.
I have got even more good news too. I have lost 5lbs this week so that puts me down to 115lbs. Woop! I have been waiting to see that number on the scales for ages.
I am off work again this week so hopefully i can have another successful week.
Today was a 400 calorie day so i have eaten:

• Cup of tea
• Muller light yogurt 
• Banana 
• One slice of toast.

I hope you are all doing well too and good luck :)
Thankyou x x x

The Answer That Could Never Be Found

ABC Day One - 500 calories

Breakfast - Nothing
Lunch - A cup of tea
Tea - Sweets (Not one of my best decisions)

Weight: 120lbs

With this diet, each day i am going to answer questions that you may or may not want to know about me. I will start off with a few of my own and then if you want to ask me any then i will definately answer them for you.
Q. When did my relationship with food change?
A. When i was probably around 11 years of age, i started to cut out certain foods, in hope to lose weight.

Hey there,
So today went pretty well, i did plan on going to the gym but it was raining so much, i would have been a drowned rat by the time i would have got there. So i am going to go there tomorrow as i don't have to go to work.
I am really tired at the moment, i don't see why though, i didn't wake up until 8:30 this morning and i had about an hours sleep at 4pm.
I am going shopping with my sister on Saturday and i am really worried about what we are going to have to eat because i really want to stick to this diet. But knowing my sister, she will want to go to some fast food place. To be honest, i am not a fan of fast food, i am never really tempted by it however hungry i am. It's like i never really have hot meals, i just don't find them that appealing. I just hope we can buy some sandwiches from Tesco or something.
Well, i hope you are all having a good day.
Night x x x

It Found Me To Hold Me

Hey,
Thought I would do a quick post before I go to sleep. This week has not gone very good I am afraid, I hate Easter, I feel disgusting :(. But tomorrow I am starting the ABC which I am actually really excited about. I really hope I stick to it, this could be it, it may be my time to lose weight if that makes any sense. I am really tired at the moment and don't usually make much sense when I am. I want to weigh myself but I dont want to because I am afraid of what the scales say :(. What do you think i should do weigh or nay?
I will update you tomorrow.
Night night x x x

You Were My Voice When I Couldn't Speak

Hey there,
Why does this keep happening, there has to be some reason right? I haven't really been binging but i have eaten loads of shit, that i shouldn't. I haven't lost any weight either.
However i have come up with a very good plan that i really hope that i will stick to. So i fucked up this morning but that doesn't mean i can't start now. So for 24 hours i will only have water, then for the rest of tomorrow and for Sunday i will fast but i will allow myself drinks like juice and tea. Then on Monday i am going to start the ABC diet with at least doing half an hour exercise per day.
I really need to lose this weight and fast, if anyone has any other ideas that have worked for them, please let me know,thanks.
Today i haven't got work because it's good Friday. Well it'not fucking going good for me but I hope your day is going good though and that you are all staying strong.
Thankyou  x x

P.S. Thinspo :)

This Feels So Wrong, That It Feels Right.

Hello lovelies.
Today has gone really well. I have had about 3 slices of bread (Yeah, i know lot's of carbs, i am trying to stop them gradually), a muller youghrt and a coffee. I let myself have 600 calories today and i think i stayed just below it so that was really good. Haven't really done much exercising apart from walking to and from work, my leg is still playing up :(.
I weighed in at 118lbs this morning, quite happy about that. For some reason though, i have been in a awful mood, i really don't know why though. Maybe it's the lack of food but i don't usually feel like this. Hopefully tomorrow my mood will be better otherwise people will start to notice.
It's gotten colder today and i can really feel it, my hands are so cold right now, it's hard to type on my laptop lol. And the tip of my nose is cold too :).
Anyways hope you have had a lovely day and speak to you soon xxxxx

They All Think I'm Crazy, But To Me It's Perfect Sense.

Hey there,
Sorry it's been a long time. I have been quite busy with work and figuring out how to do this weight loss thing and not fail again. It's hard i will admit.
I have done okish for the last week and now i am on week 2. I have only lost 3lbs though which is really frustrating because i really thought i would lose a little bit more than that. But a loss is a loss i suppose.
I have hurt my leg, so i can't go to the gym, which is really fucked up because i am one of those crazy people who actually like the gym. Does anyone have any other alternative exercise that i can easily lose weight with while resting my leg. It has been so sunny here in England it's lovely. I went for a walk along the beach, it's just so damn depressing that i can't go and tan on the beach because i am too fat. Urghh!
Anyways, i am pretty tired so i think i will be off to bed soon and i will update you on my progress soon.
Thankyou x x